Fourth Grade Friday II: Our New Arrivals
by Clubhouse Treats
Summary: The eighth (and last) season of Thank You, Heavenly finally arrives, with the kids in the fifth grade and KG's gang in the ninth grade. While KG and his friends try to find their place in high school, the kids are faced with the decision to bring back Fourth Grade Friday when the new fourth graders opt to make a name for themselves.
1. Fourth Grade Friday II Script

_Thank You, Heavenly _

Theme Song: "Let It Roll" by Divide the Day

SEASON 8

EPISODE 1

Airdate: October 11, 2019

"Fourth Grade Friday II: Our New Arrivals" (Season Premiere)

Special Guest Stars: Larisa Oleynik as Denise

_#TYH802_

COLD OPEN

_(Natalie Taylor's cover of Phil Collins' "In the Air Tonight" plays in the background)_

_Fade into a shot of a medieval kingdom. A young adult man wearing a monk's outfit runs into the castle holding something in a jeweled box. He runs through various hallways displaying statues of knights, kings, and animals such as mooses, lions, and scorpions. He finally stops when he approaches his destination, a room locked behind steel double doors. The man takes a key wrapped around his neck and uses it to electronically unlock the doors. They open, and the man continues running and stops when he sees a large throne resting above him. However, the throne is backwards, and the man cannot see whoever is sitting on the throne._

MAN: Sir, your crown is finally here.

_The throne spins around to reveal RK sitting on it, wearing a sultan's robe._

RK: Took you long enough.

MAN: You've been away all summer, sir. You've been resting for too long. Time to control the kingdom like we talked about.

RK: Hand over the crown.

_The man takes the crown out of the box, and it has "Fifth Grade" inscribed on the side. The man gets down on his knees and raises up the crown for RK to take._

MAN: It took a year, but it's finally yours.

RK: Really? Feels way more like seven. Whatever. It's beautiful.

_RK slowly places the crown on his head, but before he can finish, "In the Air Tonight" stops playing and the scene cuts to RK waking up in the middle of the night. He sighs, then looks directly at the camera._

RK: Don't you hate it when people cut your coronations short?

_Cue the "Thank You, Heavenly" opening sequence, featuring "Let It Roll."_

SCENE 1

iCarly Elementary School

Exterior Entrance

Seattle, Washington

_A large "Welcome Back Students" banner is shown on the front of the school as iCarly Elementary students begin walking in for the new year. The camera cuts to Sparky, Buster, RK, Wade, and Jaylynn, all surveying the school as they stand near the entrance. _

SPARKY: Well, guys, this is it. The rest of our lives.

JAYLYNN: What are you talking about? It's just the first day of school.

RK: Just the first day of school? Jaylynn, this is the most important day of our lives up to this point. This is where we define our legacy. This is huge.

JAYLYNN: Since when do you care about being here?

RK: Since I said goodbye to fourth grade and hello to fifth grade. We're seniors now. We're the kings, the bosses of all bosses. If something gets done in this school, we have to cosign it.

WADE: RK, we're just fifth graders. It's not like we have any political power.

RK: In due time, my genius friend. In due time.

SCENE 2

iCarly Elementary School

Interior Hallway

Seattle, Washington

_The kids are leaving the auditorium after an assembly and going to their new lockers._

BUSTER: That assembly was terrible. I know Principal MacGregor didn't brush his teeth this morning.

JAYLYNN: How can you tell?

BUSTER: He kept looking back and forth like he was hiding something. I know it, I've been there.

SPARKY: Well, at least it's over. Now we can enjoy these brand new senior lockers.

RK: Oh no, Sparko, these aren't just senior lockers. These are our thrones. Today, we become anointed.

WADE: On one hand, I love that you actually want to be here, but on the other hand, you should give up this pipe dream of us creating some kind of dynasty.

RK: I'm just excited, man. After years of having to look up to someone else, we finally get to run this place. We're the ones who get the most props from now on.

BUSTER: He's right. Plus, this is the last year we're all together before we go to junior high. Might as well make the most of it.

SPARKY: Hey, wait a minute, what makes you think we're going to become separated after graduation? I thought we were all applying to the same middle school.

BUSTER: Well, I don't know, Wade's always talked about going to one of those upper class, fancy junior high schools. I'm just preparing for the disappointment.

WADE: Even if we don't go to the same school, at least I'll still be in Seattle. I'm not moving back home like some people.

JAYLYNN: Hey, I'm never going back to Portland. But I'll probably go where Anja goes.

RK: Dude, your crush on Anja is so 2016.

JAYLYNN: I'm over it, bitch. I have a crush on Anna now.

RK: Like hell you do.

SPARKY: Buster's right. This really could be our last year together.

_Sparky takes a look inside his new locker and realizes the noticeable size._

SPARKY: I want to be sad, but damn, this is a beautiful locker.

SCENE 3

George Meyer High School

Interior Hallway

Seattle, Washington

_KG, Rodney, Trevor, and Denise all walk into their new school. _

RODNEY: Damn, this school is like a palace. I bet half the kids here are training for the NBA.

TREVOR: I hate this place. Why couldn't we have gone to my buddy Roger's high school? I know people who know people there.

DENISE: Trevor, that school has a 44.6% graduation rate.

TREVOR: So? That just means the other 50% of kids don't belong in high school.

RODNEY: You sure you don't want to slide yourself in with them too?

KG: Guys, let's not fight, this is a good thing. No matter what high school we chose, we had to make a name for ourselves and start over. Lucky for you guys, I already put us on the right path.

RODNEY: You joined the football team?

DENISE: Better than that. You're running for class president?

TREVOR: You're going to run around the school screaming "Alhamdulillah" buck naked?

KG: Close. I went viral with my comedy at the Laugh Machine. Everybody knows who I am already.

RODNEY: Are you going to explain which one of us was close?

DENISE: KG, I know that show was huge for you, but I don't know how that helps us.

KG: Well, since people will recognize me, and you guys are my friends, they'll recognize you too. We'll be running this school by recess.

TREVOR: I think the buck naked thing is way better, and they'll respect you for it because you're new.

_At that point, some older boys approach the kids. _

KG: Alright, guys, check this out. _*addressing the boys* _Hey guys, you know the Laugh Machine? I can get you some real good seats for a set.

OLDER BOY: What?

OLDER BOY #2: He's a freshman, keep walking.

_The older boys snicker as they continue walking past KG and the guys. _

DENISE: At least they know you're a freshman.

RODNEY: Maybe you _should_ try the buck naked thing.

_KG stares angrily at Rodney, who shrugs._

SCENE 4

iCarly Elementary School

Interior Lunchroom

Seattle, Washington

_The kids are eating lunch when Sparky walks up to the table with his tray._

SPARKY: You know, school lunch always tastes weird when you've eaten real food for two months.

BUSTER: Wait, no chocolate milk? That's always been your first day drink.

SPARKY: Not this year. Now that I'm a fifth grader, I wanted to make a change, so say hi to strawberry milk. Wait, why is this cow choking the strawberry? Nobody wants to see that shit.

_Cut to Wade and Jaylynn. Jaylynn is frustrated while looking at her schedule._

JAYLYNN: God, this blows.

WADE: What's wrong, Jaylynn?

JAYLYNN: It's our schedule. None of our new teachers have cool names. I at least thought during our senior year, we would get taught by a Sumac or a Niedermeyer or a Pershuni.

RK: I would pay money to have a teacher named Pershuni.

JAYLYNN: See, you get it.

_Manny and Will walk up to the guys._

MANNY: Alright, guys, we need to figure out who's bringing what for Fourth Grade Friday.

SPARKY: Manny, what are you talking about?

MANNY: Did I stutter?

RK: No, but now that we're in the fifth grade, can these little meetings stop being a regular thing?

WILL: You guys didn't forget about Fourth Grade Friday, did you? We need to plan strategy.

_Beat._

RK: Oh, f***, we're fifth graders now. I forgot.

BUSTER: Fourth Grade Friday. That sounds really familiar. Is that a deal Woody's promoting at Ike's?

SPARKY: No, Buster, Fourth Grade Friday is the first Friday of the school year where the fifth graders beat up the fourth graders. Remember, it happened to us?

BUSTER: Oh shit, I remember everything now. They made me throw up that day. Those bastards are going down!

MANNY: You're in the fifth grade now, _mamao_. _You're_ going to beat up the new fourth graders.

SPARKY: Nobody's going to beat up the new fourth graders.

JAYLYNN: Yeah, it's just some lame tradition. Who cares if we do it or not?

WILL: We can't just act like we control this school. We have to prove it. These little kids need to be afraid of us so they can respect us.

JAYLYNN: But they're the same size we were a year ago.

MANNY: Look, we're not really seniors until we do Fourth Grade Friday. When's the first meeting for the senior committee?

WADE: After school.

MANNY: Then that's where we can plan what we're gonna do. You guys might be pussies, but no way everyone else is.

_Manny and Will leave the table. _

JAYLYNN: It's been a while since I've last said this, but I really hate that kid.

BUSTER: We can't do Fourth Grade Friday. If someone finds out, we'll probably all get arrested.

RK: Yeah, I don't need to start the year with a record.

SPARKY: And you won't have to. After what we went through on Fourth Grade Friday, it's never happening to anybody ever again.

WADE: I agree that continuing the tradition is a non-starter, but what if next year's fifth graders bring it back?

SPARKY: Then they do, but we can at least break the cycle while we're here. Those fourth graders are probably worried sick about what we might do to 'em.

BUSTER: I remember crying so much that day after what happened.

RK: Come on, man, it's not like they tried choking you to death.

BUSTER: They might as well have!

SCENE 5

George Meyer High School

Interior Hallway

Seattle, Washington

_KG is having a drink at the water fountain while Rodney and Trevor stand near him._

RODNEY: You guys notice that this place smells like weed? It's kinda gross.

TREVOR: But we smoke weed too. Wait, is this your way of going clean on us?!

RODNEY: No, it's not the good weed that this school smells like. It's the low-grade, corner store weed that the dealer probably charged a high price for.

TREVOR: Yeah, high school kids don't really care about getting the best weed. It's all about doing lines here. That's why we need to hit those high school parties.

RODNEY: What?

KG: It's our first day here, nobody knows who we are, and you guys are worried about sniffing coke?

TREVOR: How are you supposed to get high off sniffing Coke? They don't even put crack in there like they used to.

_Beat._

KG: I don't know what my life is about anymore.

_Denise runs up to the guys._

DENISE: Hey guys, I just found out the best news. There's a freshman party tomorrow after school.

RODNEY: I don't care about meeting other freshmen.

DENISE: Well, you gotta start somewhere. If we're the life of the party, then we'll be the most popular kids in the ninth grade. Then the other grades will know who we are, we'll stand out, and everybody will love us.

KG: I like it. A long-term strategy for being popular. We need to hit that party.

RODNEY: Do we have to? There's nothing cool about being around other freshmen.

TREVOR: And there won't even be any lines there.

KG: Look, if you want to get your hands on some _cocaína_, this party is the first step. We need to let this whole school know that we're coming for the crown.

RODNEY: Dude, no offense, but this is high school we're talking about. We can't just walk in not knowing our place and expect people to bow down to us.

KG: See? You see that? That's the negativity I warned you not to bring here, and you didn't listen. Why didn't you?

_Trevor shakes his head and sucks his teeth, which causes Rodney to shove him._

SCENE 6

iCarly Elementary School

Interior Study Hall

Seattle, Washington

_After school, the fifth graders are inside study hall conducting their first meeting for the senior committee. _

ASHLEY: Okay everyone, I hope you enjoyed your first day of fifth grade. Welcome to the senior committee. We're going to meet twice a week to discuss ways that we can help make our senior year more interesting. We're also going to plan for the yearbook in this room, talk about fundraisers for the senior trip in this room, and help each other prepare for junior high in this room. Any questions?

MANNY: Well, I'm pretty sure the big question on everyone's mind is, what are we gonna do about Fourth Grade Friday?

SANNA: Son of a bitch.

ASHLEY: Manny, we're here to discuss actual issues.

MANNY: Hey, look, I'm here for that too. Alright? And I know it's a touchy subject, but I'm just asking what everyone else wishes they could.

JAYLYNN: No. Nobody wishes they could ask that, don't lie on me when I'm sitting right here.

SANNA: You know what? Let me keep this short and sweet. Fourth Grade Friday was started years ago because of racism, and now, it's still here because some dumbass fifth graders wanted to act like they were hot shit. Bottom line, we're not doing it.

MANNY: i don't think you have a choice. The fourth graders are already expecting a beatdown, we can't just let them go home safe.

RK: Actually, Manny, there's a way around that. If we don't beat up the fourth graders, it will be like the ultimate torture. They'll wait for it all day, and then they'll be confused as hell when it doesn't happen.

MANNY: That's evil. I like it, let's mess with their minds.

SANNA: Does anybody have anything relevant to say?

_Buster raises his hand. _

SANNA: Yes, Buster?

BUSTER: Can we go to Disney World for our senior trip?

_Ashley and Sanna look at each other with confusion. _

ASHLEY: I...don't think something like that will be in our budget, Buster.

BUSTER: What about Disneyland?

SANNA: No Disneyland, no Vegas, no Hawaii Atlantis cruise ship shit, none of that. We need to keep it small.

BUSTER: Man, this year's already a flop.

SCENE 7

iCarly Elementary School

Interior Hallway

Seattle, Washington

_The kids are at their lockers after the senior committee meeting. _

SPARKY: Nice job getting Manny to give up on Fourth Grade Friday, RK.

RK: Somebody had to stop him. I like busting heads, but only on people who deserve it.

JAYLYNN: Are Ashley and Sanna really gonna run the whole senior year? Because that sounds like your job, Sparky.

BUSTER: Yeah, man, you have to save us. We can't let our senior trip be at some lame place like in some national park, or at Pizza Hut. Wait, maybe we can. Either way, I don't like where this is headed.

SPARKY: I'll let Ashley and Sanna handle things for now. If everyone wants to see me do it, we can always put it to a vote.

WADE: Ugh, going home on the first day is always depressing.

RK: How is it depressing? We didn't even get any homework.

WADE: Thank you for answering your own question. I'll see you guys later.

KIDS: See ya.

SCENE 8

iCarly Elementary School

Exterior Entrance

Seattle, Washington

_Sparky and Buster walk towards Sparky's car to go home when they are approached by four younger-looking boys. The two turn around and see the angry expressions on the four boys._

BUSTER: Dude, I think someone put a hit out on us.

SPARKY: Can we help you guys?

SHANE: Shut the f* up.

SPARKY: You run up on us near my car and you have the nerve to talk to me like that? What's wrong with you?

BUSTER: Yeah, guys, get out of here before something happens.

JAKE: Oh yeah, like we're going to take any threat from Buster Newman seriously.

BUSTER: Okay, now, I'm really starting to think this is a hit.

SPARKY: Will you guys just tell us what the hell your problem is?

SHANE: We know about Fourth Grade Friday. We know you've been talking, and we know you think you're gonna beat us up all day. Well, it's not happening.

SPARKY: You must have heard wrong because we don't have anything planned.

DREW: Of course, you would say that. You fifth graders always think you can lie to everybody.

BUSTER: Let's go. These kids clearly need a hug.

SHANE: Oh, you're not going anywhere, bitch.

_Shane grabs Buster's arm, and Buster screams while elbowing him in the face. Jake, Drew, and the fourth boy Wilson begin attacking Sparky and Buster, and while they initially hold their own, the numbers game is too much and the two are overwhelmed by the fourth graders. In the end, Sparky is rammed into the car door twice, and Buster gets tossed onto the hood of the car and ends up rolling onto the other side, landing on the ground._

SHANE: Let this be a lesson. Forget about Fourth Grade Friday, or we're coming back.

_The fourth graders run away to avoid being seen by anybody, while Sparky and Buster writhe in pain on the ground. _

BUSTER: God, please take me into the light!

SCENE 9

The MacDougal Household

Interior Living Room

Seattle, Washington

_That night, the gang has met up to discuss the assault from earlier. _

JAYLYNN: They're not getting away with this. They think this is over, we'll get every fifth grader we can find and we'll give those punks a Fourth Grade Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. For three days in a row, they'll catch an ass-whooping.

WADE: Seriously, they just jumped you guys in the street? And nobody did anything?!

SPARKY: Nope. They made sure nobody was around.

RK: I can't believe Manny was right. Well, that settles it. We'll have to kill every fourth grader we see, just let me get my gun.

BUSTER: Hey, kids don't have to die over this. It's not that serious.

JAYLYNN: Not that serious? This is war! We can't just let those idiots get away with this.

SPARKY: Jaylynn, if we retaliate, the fourth graders are going to go crying to Principal MacGregor that we beat them up. Then if we tell him what they did, it'll just look like we're trying to get away with it. Our hands are tied.

WADE: This is unprecedented. I've never seen the fourth graders strike first. Usually, they would just hide in garbage cans and think of the quickest way to get to the hospital.

RK: Are you guys sure you don't want payback for this? Because, for real, I can get the gun, find the kids who did this, and just make it rain like in those action movies.

SPARKY AND BUSTER: Yes.

RK: Alright, but I'll keep it ready when you stop being sure.

SCENE 10

George Meyer High School

Interior Gymnasium

Seattle, Washington

_Some generic-sounding pop music plays in the background as some of the ninth graders dance around and talk to each other at the freshman mixer. KG, Rodney, Trevor, and Denise all look lost as they hold cups of punch in their hands and sit on the bleachers. _

KG: So, this is it. First party of the year. Exciting stuff.

TREVOR: Don't worry, KG, maybe we're just not meant to run this school. Besides, we all know this is Denise's fault.

DENISE: It's my fault that you guys wanna be antisocial?

RODNEY: Well, it's not like you're out there busting some dance moves.

DENISE: That's because I dance like a blind penguin, and I still want you guys to respect me.

KG: Look, this party's shit. Let's just go to the movies or something.

TREVOR: Wait, I want to see how much respect I lose for Denise.

_Denise gives Trevor an angry expression. _

SCENE 11

_Later on, KG and the others are on their way to the movies when KG sees someone familiar across the street. He stops to take a closer look and notices Bitch Clock unloading several boxes from a truck with members from his drug dealing organization. _

KG: What the...

TREVOR: KG, what's going on? Did you remember something awful from your childhood?

KG: No, that just looks a lot like Bitch Clock.

DENISE: Bitch Clock? What is that?

KG: Eh, just some drunk alarm clock my brother's friend has. I want to check this out.

_KG walks across the street to greet Bitch Clock, leaving Rodney, Trevor, and Denise confused._

DENISE: Did he just say that his brother's friend has a drunk alarm clock?

RODNEY: Look, whatever the hell's going on here, it beats the movies by a country mile.

_The others follow KG as he runs up to Bitch Clock._

KG: Hey, Bitch Clock, what are you doing out here with all these boxes?

BITCH CLOCK: Are you the D's in disguise? Because I'm not going back to jail, you're gonna have to kill me before I...

KG: No, no, I'm KG. You don't know who I am?

BITCH CLOCK: KG? No, that name doesn't ring a bell. Are you related to the guy that sold me my first apartment?

KG: No, you drunk, I'm RK's older brother. Remember RK? Sparky's friend? Do you understand the words that are coming out of my mouth?!

BITCH CLOCK: Oh yeah, right, you are brothers with RK. I never sold him anything, though, so you don't have any stories on me.

KG: I'm not trying to put you back in jail. I just want to know what all these boxes are for.

TREVOR: Wow, this really is a talking alarm clock. Are you drunk right now? Quick, if you're drunk, say the alphabet while dancing in a straight line.

BITCH CLOCK: Yeah, I'm pretty sure I've sold something to you before. Look, I have some high-quality product right here, but none of you can say anything.

DENISE: You're selling drugs?!

BITCH CLOCK: Will you keep your voice down?!

_*whispering* _DENISE: You're selling drugs?!

BITCH CLOCK: These aren't drugs, moron. Those shipments would never come in a public place. These are 100% genuine Popeyes chicken sandwiches.

RODNEY: You're kidding, right?

BITCH CLOCK: Not at all. I'll sell you two for $20 right now.

TREVOR: I'll take 20 for $500, I don't give a damn.

KG: Save your money, Trev. Dude, why do you need to sell chicken sandwiches like they're weed?

BITCH CLOCK: It's a business, man. Demand is the key. Look, for weeks, people have been going crazy for these sandwiches. There have been riots, robberies. Kids are killing their own mothers just to get their hands on this stuff.

DENISE: And that's why you're selling them? Because it's a valuable product?

BITCH CLOCK: Look who has a future in business. The only problem is, they gave me more sandwiches than I can move. I could eat them myself, but I don't think that's a healthy decision.

KG: You're an alcoholic drug dealer and you think eating chicken sandwiches is too far?

BITCH CLOCK: Hey, it's not the best lifestyle, but it's my lifestyle. Now, unless you guys are here to make some purchases, I suggest you pretend you never saw these.

TREVOR: Why don't you just give us the extra sandwiches?

BITCH CLOCK: Why the hell would I do that?

TREVOR: Because you just said you have too many. You're so stupid.

BITCH CLOCK: Wow, this guy actually makes Buster look like Einstein.

DENISE: I think what Trevor means is there's an open market that's waiting to buy these sandwiches: High school kids. We sell these to them, they'll go crazy wanting to buy them up, and we split the money with you 50/50.

BITCH CLOCK: I don't think so. My dealing's not supposed to get other people in trouble.

KG: Yeah, because yesterday, some dude was locked up for criminal fast food possession. Come on, man, just let us sell the extra sandwiches and you'll get your cut of the profits.

BITCH CLOCK: Ugh, fine. I'll arrange for us to meet somewhere private and I'll give you the goods. But I want those boxes emptied, those mouths fed, and my pockets lined.

KG: Don't worry about it. We'll have those kids at our feet.

BITCH CLOCK: By the way, since you guys are in high school, a word of advice: If they ever give you a book report on _Great Expectations_, forget watching the movie. You're just gonna be confused.

KG: Okay, thank you for that. We're going now.

_KG leaves with Rodney, Trevor, and Denise. _

KG: Hey, not that I have a problem with it, but why did we just agree to sell Popeyes chicken sandwiches?

DENISE: We have nothing better to do and somebody's gotta eat them?

_Beat._

KG: Yup, sounds about right.

SCENE 12

Ike's Ice Cream Emporium

Exterior Entrance

Seattle, Washington

_After school, the kids walk into Ike's and go looking for their booth. They notice the place is filled with fourth graders. They walk towards the booth and see the fourth graders that assaulted Sparky and Buster the day before sitting in it._

RK: You gotta be kidding me. Our restaurant has been invaded in less than a week?

WADE: Figures. It's not like this place attracts too many fifth graders.

JAYLYNN: Well, maybe we could...

SPARKY: Wait a minute.

JAYLYNN: What?

SPARKY: Those are the kids that jumped me and Buster yesterday.

JAYLYNN: Oh, then they're getting out of the booth. F* that.

_Jaylynn storms towards the booth with the guys following her._

JAYLYNN: So, what, you boys just thought you were gonna get away with it?

SHANE: Yeah, I have no idea what you're talk...

_Jaylynn grabs Shane and begins choking him._

JAYLYNN: Yes, you know what the f* I'm talking about!

JAKE: Oh no, it's Crazy Jaylynn from Portland! I hear she swallows knives!

SHANE: Look, we were just trying to get you guys to back off! We don't want a war, please!

JAYLYNN: It's too late for that. Nobody lays a hand on my friends without ending up in the ER.

SPARKY: Jaylynn, let him go.

JAYLYNN: But...

SPARKY: Now.

_Jaylynn sighs and removes her grip from Shane._

SPARKY: Okay, boys, what you did yesterday was all kinds of f*ed up, but we're gonna let it slide because we're not trying to seek revenge. How about this? We leave each other alone, no Fourth Grade Friday, and that's it. Sound like a plan?

DREW: You don't mean that.

SPARKY: How do you know what I mean?

RK: He doesn't, he probably just wants Jaylynn to choke him too.

DREW: You don't think the fifth graders have tried letting the fourth graders know in the past that nothing will happen, and it happened anyway? We've heard stories all the time about these "plans."

WADE: You should be lucky we're offering you anything since you beat up our friends for no reason.

SHANE: No, they deserved it! I'm tired of the fifth graders thinking they can do whatever they want and everybody else just has to accept it. You're not touching us on Fourth Grade Friday!

BUSTER: Well, how about we touch you right now on Fourth Grade Tuesday?!

RK: Easy, Buster. Let me try one more thing. You guys don't understand that we were just like you. We went through Fourth Grade Friday too, and it was one of the worst days of our lives. But we decided it would never happen to anyone ever again, so just calm down. We're not planning anything against you guys.

_There is a brief pause before Shane slaps RK as hard as he can in his face. RK screams and grabs Shane, which gets the attention of some of the other customers. At that point, Wade and Jaylynn corner the other boys._

RK: You made the wrong decision, you f*ing mosquito!

WOODY: Hey guys, take this outside. You're disturbing the customers.

SPARKY: We were just leaving, Woody. We had to let these guys know that everything's cool. Let's go, guys.

_RK lets go of Shane and the members of TSE leave Ike's while the fourth grade boys actually look a little worried. Cut to the kids walking out of the restaurant. _

RK: Dude, you have no idea how much I want to bust some heads. How dare they?!

WADE: I know. They put hands on us, they sit in our booth, they try dictating orders? This is disgusting!

JAYLYNN: Sparky, Buster, I know we're trying to be diplomatic and shit, but they went too far. We need to teach them a lesson.

SPARKY: Oh, we're not teaching them a lesson.

RK: Dammit!

WADE: Sparky, you can't be serious.

SPARKY: I mean, we're going to do a lot worse than teach them a lesson. We're going to leave those kids begging for mercy. We're going to give them the worst Fourth Grade Friday anyone's ever seen.

WADE: Beautiful.

BUSTER: Sparky, this is going to be huge. We need to make the fifth grade proud.

SPARKY: Oh, we will, Buster. We will.

_The instrumental to "Let It Roll" plays briefly in the background as the kids trade sinister looks, having been pushed to go on with Fourth Grade Friday._

SCENE 13

The MacDougal Household

Interior Living Room

Seattle, Washington

_That night, the entire fifth grade has congregated in Sparky's living room. _

SANNA: No way. Are you guys vaping? No, seriously, where are the pens? We're taking them away right now.

SPARKY: This isn't a joke, Sanna. The fourth graders deserve this. We can't let them run around and disrespect us without any payback. This is what Fourth Grade Friday was made for.

MANNY: Testify, my man.

ASHLEY: Sparky, I know what the fourth graders did was awful, but do you really think it's the best idea to beat them up? What's that gonna prove?

RK: It's gonna prove that they might have sold their soul to the devil, but their asses will always be ours!

WILL: Pause.

MANNY: I know, right? Still, testify.

JAYLYNN: Look, for anybody on the fence, this is bigger than us. The fourth graders thought something was gonna happen to them, so they crossed the line and disrespected us. If we let them get away with this, it won't even be our school. They need to be walking around on their knees kissing our shoes for the rest of the year.

SANNA: I'm not getting involved. I know you guys love to come up with schemes, but I can't get caught for this.

ASHLEY: Me either. This whole thing sounds like trouble, and I'm not a big fan of trouble.

_Ashley and Sanna leave the house at that point, along with a few other random fifth graders. _

SPARKY: Come on, guys, we need to stick together. Gilcania, you're leaving too?!

GILCANIA: Sorry, honey, this isn't worth it. Let me know when you're ready to be mature about this.

_Gilcania leaves the house as well. Halley, Manny, Will, and some other fifth graders have stayed behind. _

JAYLYNN: Are we wrong here? Are we not making sense?

HALLEY: No, you are. Look, do I like that things escalated to this? No. But nobody puts their hands on my boyfriend and gets away with it. They're playing themselves.

BUSTER: I always knew Halley was a soldier.

MANNY: Just forget the other ones. They were going to slow us down anyway. Now, all that's left are the real ones. The dream team.

JAYLYNN: Just so you know, we're only doing this for the greater good. Once it's over, I'm going right back to hating you.

MANNY: I can live with that, sis.

SCENE 14

George Meyer High School

Interior Lunchroom

Seattle, Washington

_The next day at school, KG and his gang are selling Popeyes chicken sandwiches at their lunch table. There are four long lines as the high schoolers scream to get some sandwiches, and the gang is trying to collect everyone's money fast enough._

KG: Alright, everybody, there's no need to fight. We have enough sandwiches for everyone.

BOY: I can't believe you got these. My brother said they're the bomb.

GIRL: Yeah, how did you get so many?

_KG, Rodney, Trevor, and Denise look at each other with concern._

DENISE: We know a guy.

GIRL: I was thinking that, because I checked Popeyes yesterday and they said they were sold out.

TREVOR: You're talking too much. Grab your patty and move along.

_The girl has an annoyed look on her face as she pays for her sandwich and walks away._

KG: This is crazy. A few days ago, we were losers. Now, everybody wants a piece of us.

RODNEY: Nah, we're still losers. We're just losers with really good food.

TREVOR: Rodney, you're not looking at the bigger picture. We were at the bottom of the totem pole because we had nothing valuable to bolster our image. Now, with these sandwiches, we have a status symbol that we can leverage to get what we want along with a financial windfall.

_KG, Rodney, and Denise all look at Trevor with bewilderment._

TREVOR: What? My uncle used to work in advertising. He got fired, though. Threatened to shoot his boss, said he was joking, but we don't think he was.

SHAUN: Yo, are these real Popeyes chicken sandwiches?

DENISE: That's right. Regular or spicy?

SHAUN: Actually, you oughta save some of these for me. I'm throwing a party on Friday and I don't want to waste money on refreshments. I'll send you guys an invite and you can bring the sandwiches.

RODNEY: What grade are you in?

BOY: Twelfth.

RODNEY: We will be there with the sandwiches.

SHAUN: Alright, cool. Here's my number. Text me yours and I'll let you know everything.

_Shaun gives the guys a small piece of paper with his number on it._

TREVOR: Wait, why did he draw hearts on the sides?

DENISE: Does it matter? We're going to a senior party, we're cool now!

KG: Yeah, just as long as we don't run out of our supply. We need to ask Bitch Clock for more.

RODNEY: You mean, you need to ask him. We don't even know him like that.

KG: You think I know him like that?! He's my brother's friend's roommate, that's already eight degrees of separation right there!

DENISE: Well, do what you can, KG. We earned this party, we can't have it taken away for nothing.

TREVOR: Yeah, it's my right as an American to do lines in the bathroom with hot senior girls!

KG: No. That will never be a right for anybody.

SCENE 15

The MacDougal Household

Interior Living Room

Seattle, Washington

_That night, the kids are watching TV when KG walks in. There is a moment of awkwardness as they stare at each other without saying anything. _

KG: I need to speak to your alarm clock.

SPARKY: He's in the attic.

KG: Great. Hey, bro.

RK: Yo.

_KG walks upstairs to go see Bitch Clock in the attic. _

SPARKY: RK, do you know anything about that?

RK: Yeah, him and his friends are selling Popeyes chicken sandwiches that Bitch Clock gave them.

SPARKY: What? You're kidding me, we have to stop them!

RK: And do what? Besides, we still need to strategize for Fourth Grade Friday.

SPARKY: Yeah, you're right. Eyes on the prize.

JAYLYNN: Hey, do you know if KG's throwing in a deal for those sandwiches?

_The other kids look at Jaylynn with confusion. _

JAYLYNN: What?

SCENE 16

The MacDougal Household

Interior Attic

Seattle, Washington

_Bitch Clock is taking inventory of his alcohol while KG talks to him._

KG: Look, we need to move more product. There's a big party coming up and if we don't have the goods, we'll never be popular.

BITCH CLOCK: I wish I could do something for you, but I'm not. Besides, you guys just took the money and ran. What the hell happened to that?

KG: Maybe we can focus on my issues here. We both know you have more than enough sandwiches, so make it happen.

BITCH CLOCK: Don't have to. These sandwiches are selling themselves, people are going crazy over them. I'm not letting that kind of money go because you want to get laid or something.

KG: I have a girlfriend.

BITCH CLOCK: Yeah, like she's gonna put out. Bottom line, the deal's off. Figure something else out.

KG: I can see now why my brother hates you so much.

_KG looks at the alcohol in the attic, takes one of the bottles from its shelves, stares at it, smashes it on the floor, and runs downstairs. _

BITCH CLOCK: What the hell is your problem?!

_Bitch Clock smells the alcohol on the floor. _

BITCH CLOCK: Oh, it's just Cuervo. Nothing to worry about.

SCENE 17

iCarly Elementary School

Interior Principal's Office

Seattle, Washington

_The_ next_ day, Sparky, Buster, RK, Wade, and Jaylynn walk into Principal MacGregor's office. _

PRINCIPAL MACGREGOR: You know, I was hoping I would be a while before I saw any of you in my office this year. But now, it looks like I lost the pool.

SPARKY: What?

PRINCIPAL MACGREGOR: Nothing. Have a seat.

JAYLYNN: I can't have a seat. There aren't any for me.

PRINCIPAL MACGREGOR: Well, just stand.

JAYLYNN: You think you could put in some orders for more chairs, because this is...

PRINCIPAL MACGREGOR: Look, I'm not going to waste time here. Are you guys planning to take part in this Fourth Grade Friday?

SPARKY: No. Who told you that?

PRINCIPAL MACGREGOR: Does it matter?

WADE: Yes. Whoever made you call us in here is slandering our names!

PRINCIPAL MACGREGOR: It was an anonymous tip and I have to respect the privacy of those who came forward. Guys, I've been here for years. I've seen many kids, you guys included, get hurt for no reason because of this silly tradition. I don't want any of you participating in it.

RK: Principal MacGregor, my friends and I strongly deny the allegations against us. We are ashamed, disgusted, and hurt that we would ever be accused of beating up fourth graders in any kind of manner.

PRINCIPAL MACGREGOR: RK, you don't have to talk like that. We're not in court.

RK: Oh, good. If you hadn't stopped me, I would have gone on a rant about cancel culture.

SCENE 18

iCarly Elementary School

Interior Lunchroom

Seattle, Washington

_At lunch, the members of TSE walk up to Ashley and Sanna's table. _

JAYLYNN: You have a lot of nerve, the both of you. I thought we were friends.

SANNA: I don't think we know what you're talking about.

SPARKY: Come on, guys, the anonymous tip? We're not stupid. You're going to blow this for us.

ASHLEY: You're going to blow our whole senior year. We had to say something.

BUSTER: Ashley, I like you and you know I think you smell nice, but this is more important than our senior year. It's about standing up for what's right. Sparky and I almost died the other day.

ASHLEY: Seriously?

_Beat._

BUSTER: I don't know what else to say. Somebody tag in.

WADE: Guys, we appreciate your concern, but if we don't teach the fourth graders a lesson, they'll never respect us. We have to show them that we're the dominant force in this school.

SANNA: There are better ways to do that than beating up on a bunch of randoms.

ASHLEY: Yeah, you guys are acting crazy.

RK: Ugh, you two sound like an after-school special. Like it or not, we're going to war tomorrow, and there's nothing you can do about it. So you can either join us and defend the honor of the fifth grade, or sit around and do nothing.

SANNA: We'll sit around and do nothing. Just don't come crying to us when this whole thing blows up in your face.

JAYLYNN: Don't worry. We won't.

_The kids walk away from the table. _

ASHLEY: You think they have a point? That we need to fight with them?

SANNA: No. I don't want to get involved with something that will get us all in trouble. I thought they would have left that childish shit behind last year.

_Beat. Sanna squints her eyes at Ashley._

ASHLEY: What?

SANNA: No, it's just that...your skin is starting to get paler. I don't even know how that's possible.

ASHLEY: I'm not really a big fan of sunlight.

SANNA: I think you should be.

SCENE 19

_("Am I Savage?" by Metallica plays in the background)_

_A montage is shown featuring the kids preparing for Fourth Grade Friday on the morning in question. Sparky, Buster, RK, Wade, Jaylynn, Halley, Manny, and Will are all gearing up for the events in their own way. Sparky packs several paint cans, skull caps, water balloons, and fingerless gloves into a sack, and then places the sack into his car. Buster is doing push-ups and jumping rope in his living room, while RK is trying to prepare himself a breakfast with protein powder. However, he is unable to open the container and instead opts for a bowl of Lucky Charms, which he eats with an intense look on his face. Wade is drawing up a chart, which depicts the fourth graders and the weaknesses that he can exploit. Jaylynn and Halley are wearing all-black outfits, and both have decided to bring baseball bats with them as they pack their gear in Jaylynn's car. Meanwhile, Manny and Will are wearing camouflage and military jackets as they arrive in Manny's car. The kids all meet in front of the school, nod at each other, then walk into the school. They get stared at by everybody as they march through the hallway, including Sanna and Ashley, who look dumbfounded as they are met with cold stares from their friends._

SCENE 20

Ken Griffey, Jr. Park

Interior Basketball Court

Seattle, Washington

_After school, the fourth graders are waiting for the fifth graders to arrive._

SHANE: So, where are they? I thought the fight was supposed to start at three.

JAKE: Pretty sure, they meant 3:06.

SHANE: Jake, I swear, now's not the time for that.

_("Am I Savage?" begins playing in the background again)_

_The fourth graders hear a loud, bizarre war cry as the fifth graders, dressed in either black or camouflage, ambush them from behind. The fourth graders are at a disadvantage in the beginning as the fifth graders engage them in hand-to-hand combat. Sparky and Buster, however, immediately set their sights on Shane's crew and begin going after them with tennis rackets to even the score._

SCENE 21

Shaun's Household

Interior Living Room

Seattle, Washington

_At the party containing mostly 12th graders, KG, Rodney, Trevor, and Denise all look nervous as they place the remaining unsold Popeyes chicken sandwiches on the table with the other refreshments. However, the sandwiches aren't nearly enough for an entire party._

RODNEY: This is sad. Are you sure that alarm clock thing can't just come over and give us some sandwiches for the party?

KG: No. He wants to keep all the profits for himself. Selfish bastard.

DENISE: Guys, we just need to tell the truth. Maybe they'll respect our honesty and let us stay.

TREVOR: Yeah, or maybe they'll pound us to death. And if they do, my blood will be on your hands, Denise.

KG: Your blood's not going on my girlfriend's hands!

TREVOR: Well, it can't go on yours. You didn't do anything.

RODNEY: I think Denise is right. They might think we're lame, but not liars.

KG: Alright, fine. But if we're about to give up our popularity, we should at least put a good face on this.

_KG whistles to get everybody's attention, and they all promptly turn to face him and his gang. The ninth graders are all frozen in fear._

KG: Wow, I thought I would have more time. Ladies and gentlemen, we just want to say that we're blessed to be invited to this party. And I know you wanted to chow down on some Popeyes chicken sandwiches, but unfortunately, we don't have enough to feed everybody.

_The seniors all groan at that point. _

KG: I know, I know, it sucks, but we just couldn't lie to you guys about this. To make it easier, everybody can form a single-file line and we'll all cut these sandwiches up into pieces so you can eat them like finger foods. Or maybe we can go to KFC, get their sandwiches. How about it?

SHAUN: No, _man,_ the deal was you bring the Popeyes sandwiches. Now, you're trying to play everybody here? Who do you think we are, Booboo the Fool?

TREVOR: Oh God, I love _Zoboomafoo._

DENISE: Trevor, could you shut the f* up for a minute?

KG: Look, I don't know who Booboo the Fool is, but I know who he's not, and you're not him. So why don't we just forget this happened and enjoy the party?

SHAUN: That doesn't work for us. We really wanted those sandwiches.

RODNEY: If we don't leave now, they're going to turn _us_ into sandwiches.

DENISE: Hey, look, I see Booboo the Fool right by the TV!

_The seniors all turn their heads and when they turn back, the door is open and the kids have already left. Cut to them running away from the house._

RODNEY: I think we lost 'em. No way they leave their own party to kill us.

DENISE: What do we do now?!

KG: I'll tell you what we're gonna do. We're gonna snitch on Bitch Clock for screwing us over.

RODNEY: Wait, wait, we didn't lose 'em! Keep running!

_The ninth graders begin screaming as the seniors chase them down the street._

SCENE 22

Ken Griffey, Jr. Park

Interior Basketball Court

Seattle, Washington

_("Am I Savage?" continues playing in the background)_

_The fight keeps going between the fourth and fifth graders. As Sparky punches one of the kids, he gets flashbacks from the original "Fourth Grade Friday" episode in season two, where he was beaten by the fifth graders and almost killed until Jaylynn came to make the save. Wade gets flashbacks of being dragged through the hallways and stuffed in a locker, RK gets flashbacks of being hit with the Go to Sleep and locked in the Anaconda Vice, and Buster gets flashbacks of being hit with raw eggs and vomiting, then collapsing on the ground. This, in turn, only makes them more aggressive. Meanwhile, Will is having trouble with one of the fourth graders when Manny dives off a nearby slide to finish the kid off._

WILL: Thanks, man.

MANNY: No problem.

_As the fight goes on, it becomes clear that the fifth graders are more dominant and some of the fourth grade kids decide to call it quits and go home. Eventually, Shane is the only fourth grader left standing, and he looks close to tears as the fifth graders surround him._

SHANE: No, please, I'm sorry! I'm sorry, we just didn't want to get pushed around this year!

RK: You said the same thing at Ike's. We're not buying it this time, bitch.

_RK pistol-whips Shane with his gun. Sparky, Buster, and Jaylynn all begin to look remorseful. _

SHANE: I give up, man. We were in over our heads, we'll never bother you guys again, i swear!

WILL: Stop lying and it will make it easier.

MANNY: Let's finish him!

RK: Alright. Wade, you hold him up. I wanna kick him right in the family jewels.

SPARKY: STOP!

_There is an awkward silence as RK shoves Shane back to the ground so he can listen to Sparky._

SPARKY: What have we turned into?! We all remember those painful moments of us being tortured, slapped up, and humiliated on Fourth Grade Friday. Now, we're just doing the same thing that was done to us.

MANNY: But they still beat up you and Buster.

SPARKY: Yeah, and we beat them up ten times worse. We made our point. What are we going to get out of ganging up on one kid?

HALLEY: Sparky's right. Look at the guy, I think he's been through enough.

BUSTER: It smells like he just pissed himself. He's definitely been through enough.

RK: Alright, we can let him go. But Shane-o, I want you to do something for all of us.

JAKE: Okay, what is it?

RK: Repeat after me. "The fifth graders gave me an ass whooping I'll never forget, and they're the undisputed kings of this school."

SHANE: The fifth graders gave me an ass whooping I'll never forget, and they're the undisputed kings of this school.

RK: "I swear that if any fourth graders try making another move, it'll be my ass again." Swear to us, motherf*er!

SHANE: I swear that if any fourth graders try making another move, it'll be my ass again. Swear to us, motherf*er!

WADE: Close enough.

SPARKY: Go home, Shane. Clean the blood off, buy some ice cream.

SHANE: Thank you.

_Sh__ane begins running off the court and away from the park, but he ends up getting speared by Ashley. Sanna then grabs Shane by his hair and pulls him back to the court._

JAYLYNN: Guys, what the hell are you doing?!

ASHLEY: You were right about Fourth Grade Friday. Nothing's going to get done this year if we don't stick together.

SANNA: It's a good thing we caught this idiot. He was just about to escape.

SPARKY: Yeah, because we spared him! We decided it wasn't worth it!

HALLEY: You two missed the whole thing!

ASHLEY: Oh.

_Beat._

SANNA: Are you still proud of us for showing up?

RK: I am, to an extent.

MANNY: Yeah, me too.

SCENE 23

The MacDougal Household

Interior Living Room

Seattle, Washington

_Later that night, the kids are on the couch watching TV and recapping the day's events. _

JAYLYNN: You know we're all getting suspended, right?

SPARKY: No, we're not. Wade, didn't the fourth graders sign those NDAs?

WADE: They did, and they're legally binding. No one talks about what happened, so we all have plausible deniability.

JAYLYNN: Okay, cool, because we really went hardcore today.

BUSTER: Is there something we can all learn from this?

RK: Sure. Violence creates violence, which only leads to a night without stars and the Milky Way.

SPARKY: What are you talking about?

RK: Don't blame me. Malcolm X said it first.

WADE: That was Martin Luther King, Jr. and you quoted him wrong.

RK: Yeah, like that's the worst thing I did today when I pistol-whipped a kid earlier.

_Beat._

JAYLYNN: I'm looking forward to another crazy-ass year with you guys.

_Cut to black. _

_("What More Can I Say" by Jay-Z plays over the end credits)_

_EPILOGUE_

The Jennings Household

Interior Living Room

Seattle, Washington

_A few days later, KG, Rodney, Trevor, and Denise are watching a live news report._

REPORTER: And in local news, a large shipment of stolen Popeyes chicken sandwiches has been recovered by the police from a seedy apartment in downtown Seattle. The top suspects are currently being apprehended so they can be brought to the precinct for questioning.

DENISE: KG, are you sure it was a good idea to give up Bitch Clock to the cops?

KG: Of course it was. His time was coming sooner or later. Some people deserve to be in jail.

TREVOR: I'm just worried he'll come after us. I heard he knows actual killers.

RODNEY: He's just a stupid alarm clock, not a street thug. We have nothing to worry about.

_Cut to the police showing up at Sparky's door, talking to Bitch Clock._

COP #1: Look, sir, we got an anonymous tip that implicates you and several others in an illegal fast food operation. We just need to ask you some questions.

BITCH CLOCK: Yeah, that really doesn't work for me.

COP #2: Sir, resisting arrest is only going to make things worse. We're prepared to use force.

_Cut to a shot of Bitch Clock_ _holding a gun behind his back._

BITCH CLOCK: Well, it's a good thing I prepared for that.

_Cut to black._

©2019 ANDERSON PRODUCTIONS

THE FINAL JOURNEY BEGINS


	2. Why Was Season 8 Delayed?

_Written 10/12/19_

-After almost five months, _Thank You, Heavenly _is back for the final time. I still remember when I first came up with the Sparky character back in 2011, and then created Buster, RK, and Wade in the summer of 2012. I only started doing the show because I was going through a period in my life where it felt like I knew everything, and I was starting to become disillusioned with television. I thought if I had a show, it would be way more entertaining than anything else on TV. Seven years and more than 160 episodes later, here I am. It hasn't been easy at all, but I was able to build something over time and use my personal experiences to create something that I can hopefully be proud of years down the line. But there will be enough time to reflect next year. For the next six or seven months, there's still a lot of work to do and a lot of things to wrap up.

-Usually, I follow every episode with the Backstage Pass, which goes into the making of a particular episode and invites the reader into my creative process. However, because season eight arrived two weeks later than it was supposed to, I wanted to just recap everything that's happened over the last few months. It helps put things in perspective and it will help remind me that I can't fail with season eight, moreso than any other season in the series.

-On May 29, I released the twenty-eighth and final episode of season seven, entitled "Farewell, 4th Grade." It concerned the kids creating their own yearbook to celebrate their experiences in the fourth grade. After that, I announced that the upcoming eighth season (2019-2020) would be the last in the series. I had plans to end the show after season eight for months, and I knew for sure that I didn't have much time left after finishing the sixth season in 2018. I wanted to end the show on a high note, I wanted to wrap things up before the show became a stale parody of itself that I hated working on, and I wanted to close things out while I still had more stories to tell. It took some time for me to adjust, but I was eventually able to come to terms with the fact that the show had less than 30 episodes left in its run.

-One problem I ran into when starting season eight was that I was starting a new season and the final season at the same time. It was different from previous years where I had a certain vision in mind for that particular season and I wanted to write this or that episode. I had to make sure season eight was something that paid respect to the show and illustrated how much it had grown since 2012. I knew the characters had to mature slightly and start dealing with the things that come with that, like letting go of the past and thinking more about the future. I also knew that I couldn't get too caught up in it being the last season and I had to just keep telling stories like I always have. It didn't help that a lot of shows on TV were either ending or entering their own final seasons. Three shows that I watch are wrapping up in 2020, but that had no influence on my decision to end _Thank You, Heavenly _because I had already made up my mind months ago.

-My plan was to begin writing season eight no later than July 22, but before that, I came up with the idea of working on a standalone episode. This episode would take place in the summer and serve as a bridge between the seventh and eighth seasons. It wouldn't belong to either season, it would just be its own thing. It was going to come out on July 28, around the time I would have started producing the first batch of episodes for season eight. I started working on the standalone episode right at the beginning of July and wrote a few scenes, but never did any more work on it. I scrapped the idea of a standalone and reworked the episode to make it part of season eight. This episode is coming Saturday night.

-Things only got worse from there. In previous years, I would always have the first half of the season mapped out. I already knew which episodes I wanted to do so by the time I had to start writing, there wouldn't be anything to figure out. However, this time, I was having a lot of trouble mapping out the first half. I knew there were many episodes I wanted to write in season eight, but the problem was with scheduling them and deciding where they should go. I had the first two or three episodes figured out, but everything else was up in the air. I didn't have the Halloween episodes penciled in yet. I wanted to write a sequel to "The Heavenly Tapes," especially after Nas released _The Lost Tapes II _this summer, but I originally had it scheduled as an October episode. As of right now, it's a February episode. Other episodes were getting rescheduled or replaced multiple times. And by the time everything was mapped out, I was already behind schedule.

-I didn't officially start writing for season eight until August 7, which was the latest I had started production in four years. I didn't start writing for season seven until July 31, 2018, but I was able to make up for it by doing a lot of work in August. This time, it was different. I was slowed down by procrastination and a lot of personal issues in the background that made it harder for me to focus than ever before. I kept saying every day that things would be different and I would try writing this amount of words or start thinking about this episode, but I just couldn't get it together. The weird part is that my mind was still working on season eight, because I kept thinking about the new episodes, but I wasn't able to do any actual work in terms of writing. I've always had a tendency to do things at the last minute, but I was going through too much to get back into my routine. Days kept going by, not much writing would take place, and I was losing a lot of valuable time.

-I had no choice but to adjust to the problems circling around me. The season premiere, the episode that I had penciled in to kick everything off for months, was replaced, and the original premiere was delayed and pushed back because I had serious issues with the story. I had to remove an episode entirely to accomodate for the original season premiere being pushed back, because if I hadn't, I would have been behind schedule even more. I didn't start working on another episode until August 24, and the first draft for that one ("Fourth Grade Friday II") took three weeks to finish.

-In September, there was still barely any work done on season eight, but I still wanted to meet the premiere date of September 29. I started slowly coming out of whatever was keeping me from writing, and I came up with a production schedule so I could stay on track. I would spend three days on one episode, move on to the next one, and spend three days on that episode. I didn't follow the schedule, so I made a second version. Then a third version, then a fourth one. And at this point, I'm considering forgetting the schedule entirely and writing whatever I can each day. It's the only thing that's worked for me when it comes to this show.

-On September 21, with just eight days to go before the premiere, I had an important decision to make. I was starting to make up for what happened in August, but I was far from where I wanted to be with the new season. I knew I wouldn't be able to make up the work fast enough if I was trying to open up the season on the 29th. Even worse than that, I had no excitement or anticipation this year. The season premiere always felt like a huge day, but this time, I could care less. I decided to throw up my hands and delay the season premiere for two weeks, so I could have more space to work on upcoming episodes without having to do rewrites yet. It would have been too much for me to write new episodes and then have to polish up the first drafts.

-Right now, things are as good as they can possibly get. I've done work on multiple episodes, and I'm determined to get everything in on time despite having to write twice as fast, but it's definitely a lot of work I have to make up for in a much shorter period. I'm hoping that by the time Thanksgiving break rolls around, things start to calm down and I'll be able to spend more time with new episodes without worrying about meeting the deadline, but that can only happen if I stay focused. One of my goals for season eight was to finish early, something I have never done before. If I can get back on schedule and stay there, I'll be able to write the series finale in March 2020, or at least have it outlined by then. Here's to another hopefully successful season.

-By the way, I have been thinking about working on a _Thank You, Heavenly_-related project after the series is over for a while now. It's definitely not a ninth season, but something entirely different. My main priority right now is obviously season eight, but this project is something that I think has potential to be really interesting, and could at least make the transition to life after _Thank You, Heavenly _less bittersweet.


	3. Fourth Grade Friday II Backstage Pass

_PRODUCTION/CULTURAL REFERENCES (written 10/12/19; 10/22/19)_

_10/12/19_

-When I decided to have the kids leave the fourth grade at the end of the seventh season, I knew I had two episodes to write: One addressing them reflecting on their last days as fourth graders, and one addressing them trying to adjust to their new roles as fifth graders. It was a transition that I knew had to happen, but one that even I had a little trouble with. It was weird referring to them as fifth graders at first, but I got used to it. I wanted the episode to feel like that: Awkward at times, but one that represented a new era for the characters.

-I decided the best way to have the kids adjust to being fifth graders was to have them revisit a previous event. Season two opened up with "Fourth Grade Friday," which was based off the real-life Freshman Friday that I started hearing about when I was in junior high. At the time, I wanted to address the cycle of violence and introduce Jaylynn to the main cast in an interesting way, but I only succeeded in doing the second thing. This time, I wanted to use the episode to show how the kids are pushed to do something they weren't interested in because they felt like they were disrespected and mistreated. While they were justified in seeking revenge, they ended up just as aggressive and hateful as the fifth graders that assaulted them originally. This is why I love referencing previous episodes because in this case, I can use them to tell new stories and show how the kids would handle a similar situation the second time around.

-I had the idea for this episode for a while. It just felt like something that made the most sense to have in season eight, and especially the final season. It was one of the few episodes I was 100% sure about having this season, and even though I didn't have it as the season premiere originally, I knew there was no better episode to introduce the kids as fifth graders than this one.

-I also knew there had to be a subplot about KG dealing with his first couple days of high school, something that I probably wouldn't have been interested in exploring a couple seasons ago. However, unlike the main plot, it didn't come easy to me. I struggled for a while to come up with something beyond the generic plot of one of the guys becoming popular and abandoning the others, then learning their lesson at the end. I just decided to treat this subplot with a more comedic approach than the main one, which was comedic, but a little more dramatic as well.

-I was thinking about the controversy this summer involving Popeyes chicken sandwiches and I thought it would be funny if the guys ended up selling them illegally to become popular. I included Bitch Clock because he would be the easiest way for KG's gang to get the sandwiches, a highly valued product that was being treated like drugs in real life. Plus, KG has rarely ever had any interaction with Bitch Clock during the series, so it was interesting to see them share scenes with each other.

-While "Fourth Grade Friday II: Our New Arrivals" was always meant for season eight, it wasn't always the season premiere. At one point, I believe it was the third episode of the season, and it would have come out on October 6. On September 29, I would have opened up the season with the original premiere and the reworked standalone episode, because both of them would have been set in the summer. Then I decided to switch this episode with the standalone and have it released on September 29. After having too many issues with the original season premiere, I decided to push it back a couple weeks and replace it with "Fourth Grade Friday II." Not only did I have to remove a later episode from the first half to make this happen (because the delayed episode took its spot on the schedule), this also meant that season eight would no longer start with a doubleheader like I wanted.

-I started writing this episode on August 24. While I technically began work on season eight roughly two weeks before that, this episode felt like the true beginning. This is also where I came up with the subplot. Of course, it took a lot longer than it was supposed to, exactly three weeks. Either way, working on this episode helped me get over the things that were preventing me from writing, and I became more serious about the season after I was done with this one.

-Because there was not enough time for me to make up the work I put off for several weeks, I decided to move the premiere date from September 29 to October 11. All this episode needed was a rewrite, but if it came out when it was supposed to, then I would have to speed up work on the second episode, and I wasn't in a position where I could do that. It was a hard decision to make, but I knew that I didn't want to put out any episodes that weren't up to my standards. If I had an episode that I knew could have been a lot better, and released it anyway, it would have bothered me too much, especially since this was the season premiere, and the last season premiere I would ever write.

-In my opinion, the season premiere is always one of the hardest episodes to write. When you take time off from something like this, and then come back to it after a few months, you're just trying to get rid of the rust and get your mind right so you can be prepared for all the work that's coming. In my case, I have to get back into the heads of all these characters and remember who they are, how they behave, and why they do the things they do. That's why it usually takes me three or four episodes before I'm completely focused again. Because the season premiere sets the tone for the rest of the year, I also have to make sure it's interesting enough for someone who wants to get excited about the show again. A good season premiere brings hope, a bad season premiere doesn't reflect well on the rest of the episodes because the starting point is weak.

-The episode title is a reference to the original "Fourth Grade Friday," and a title that I came up with a long time ago when I thought about what the first episode of season eight would be called. I came up with "According to Our New Arrivals," a reference to a line in the theme song for the ABC sitcom _Mr. Belvedere _(1985-1990). The "new arrivals" would be the kids finally arriving to the fifth grade. When I decided to bring back the concept of Fourth Grade Friday, I combined the two episode titles to make the current one.

_10/22/19_

-The cold open was added during the rewrite. I felt like the episode needed a strong opening scene, because it was the season premiere, the first episode with the kids in the fifth grade, and the last season premiere of the entire series. I fell in love with the "In the Air Tonight" cover when I heard it being used in the season six trailer for_ Power_, and when I started writing the episode, I was thinking about adding the song somewhere. It ended up just barely missing the cut, but then I thought it would be perfect in the cold open, as something separated from the rest of the episode and a way to introduce season eight.

-RK references the season five episode "Heterosexuality 101," which came out on November 13, 2016 and was the episode that officially ended Jaylynn's feelings for Anja.

-KG's high school is named after writer and producer George Meyer. Meyer was one of the original writers on _The Simpsons _and helped develop the show's comedic voice. During his time on _The Simpsons_, he wrote episodes such as "Bart vs. Thanksgiving," "Mr. Lisa Goes to Washington," "Homer the Heretic," and "Behind the Laughter," and later returned as a co-writer for _The Simpsons Movie _(2007).

-KG references his viral comedy routine from last season's "KG the Graduate." The routine gave him his first taste of fame as a comedian, but the controversy it sparked on social media forced the school to remove him from taking part in his eighth grade graduation.

-Chocolate milk being Sparky's first day drink is a reference to the original "Fourth Grade Friday," where he gets excited over having chocolate milk with his lunch. The bit was referenced a year later in the season three premiere ("14 Candles: Up All Night"), with the boys expecting him to get excited again, but this time, he doesn't.

-When Buster misunderstands the concept of Fourth Grade Friday, Manny refers to him as a sucker in Spanish ("mamao").

-When I was a senior in high school, the senior committee was really important because we were in charge of designing and putting together the yearbook, raising money for events we wanted to organize, and making sure the school year ran smoothly for all the twelfth graders. I wanted to incorporate that into the show.

-Sanna references the original backstory of Fourth Grade Friday, which involved white students bullying black students on the first Friday of the school year. It was referred to as "Fried Chicken Friday."

-Bitch Clock tells KG's gang to read the 1861 Charles Dickens novel _Great Expectations _instead of the film adaptation. The film I was specifically referencing was the 1998 version starring Ethan Hawke and Gwyneth Paltrow.

-I wasn't entirely sure about using "Am I Savage?" but after listening to it once or twice, I realized it was perfect. The montage reminded me of something from the earlier seasons of the show.

-At Shaun's party, Trevor references the PBS children's television series _Zoboomafoo _(1999-2001).

-I was debating whether or not to add a scene where Ashley and Sanna change their minds about taking part in Fourth Grade Friday, but I figured them just showing up out of nowhere would be funnier, especially since their involvement was unnecessary in the end.

-RK's incorrect quote, which he mistakenly credited to Malcolm X instead of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., was actually supposed to be "Returning violence for violence multiplies violence, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars."

-Using "What More Can I Say" at the end was actually planned a year in advance. I was listening to _The Black Album_ (2003) around this time last year and I thought that when the eighth season came, I would start it off with this exact song. The reason is because _The Black Album _was not only Jay-Z's eighth studio album, but it was originally supposed to be his last album before his retirement (which he came out of three years later). A lot of the songs from the album definitely feel like the end of an era, so I wanted to use them this season. This is also why in "Rebirth of a Salesman" and "KG Gets a Job," I used "Encore" and "Moment of Clarity," respectively. I plan to use more songs from _The Black Album_ throughout the season.

-Originally, Bitch Clock was going to be shown actually killing the cops, but I thought it wouldn't be funny enough so I just ended the epilogue with the implication that he killed them.


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